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Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The Husband Project - Day 3


You know that feeling, when you've worked so hard for a certain set of results...only to have it shatter with a careless comment?

I hate that!!

But it's pretty much how my Day Two went. And I'm so bummed about it too, because I had high expectations for being able to breeze my way through this little challenge. But, alas, I came face to face with my temper and my unforgiving side...and the combination of insensitive comment and unwillingness to forgive and move past it, spoiled our whole evening.

However, I pray your evenings were much more fruitful than mine and put happy smiles on your husband's face with your thoughtfulness toward his hobbies.

Okay, enough about day two! Let's move on so I can hopefully redeem myself. (And how ironic that this is the homework for tonight!)

Project #3

You da’ Man

Spreading Great Gossip About Your Guy



Your Project:
Say something nice about your husband to someone else. Make sure you tell him what you said, and to whom.

Getting Creative
Who are the important people in your husband’s life? Your kids, his parents, his friends? Be intentional about who you chat with when you brag on him – it’s almost as important as actually doing it.

Having a hard time coming up with something? I still brag on my guy for things he did years ago. He loves when I tell the story of how brilliantly he proposed (there were waterfalls and stuffed portabella mushrooms involved…).

Here are some other areas to think about when crafting your brag:

  • His parenting skills
  • His patience level
  • The way he treats your mom
  • His culinary ability
  • His job
  • His loyalty to you
Share with me: How was your last night? Did you side-step the Husband Pit (hopefully) or did you fall face first into it, like I did? Any ideas on who or how you're going to brag up your hubby tonight? I admit to needing to think on this one a bit. :) 

10 comments:

  1. I love this. For some reason when a group of women get together, it seems like a good excuse to complain about their husbands. I love that this about being positive and bragging on how awesome our guys are.

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  2. Last night went pretty well. We got to play one of his games together for like an hour. It was a nice way to spend time together. We also watched one of his favorite TV shows. It was fun!

    As for bragging on him--knowing WHAT to say is easy. I'm just not sure who to talk to. I guess I could post how excellent he is on FB. lol... Wait--I might do that.

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  3. My husband wasn't home last night, BUT this morning I made sure to text him and let him know that his "girls" (that's me and my daughter not...you know...lol)didn't sleep well without Daddy/Hubby in the house to make us feel safe. He didn't say it, or even text it, but I know that made his day and it's the truth. :)

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  4. My husband was gone for part of the evening and was too busy to hang out and watch his favorite show, but I offered, so at least he knew I was willing and wanted to. Guess that's half the battle.

    I have a friend who demeans her husband all the time. I feel sorry for both of them, because it (and the stuff he does too...it's a two-way street) is hurting their marriage. Speaking positive words is so important.

    Ralene, I was thinking of doing the same thing!

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  5. I'm sorry your last night didn't go the way you'd hoped, but the beautiful thing is, you get to try again tonight! :)

    My last night actually worked out pretty well. Though my DH was gone for part of it, when he came home, we talked about photography...which he loves, but I want to get glassy-eyed over. Instead, I made a concerted effort, really listened, and was so happy about the way his eyes lit up and his words came faster.

    I love to brag on my husband to all my friends. I want them to know how amazing he is. :)

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  6. I just posted my brag on facebook. I find it so funny that the things I love most about my man are also the things that push my hot buttons--not the good kind ;) He's so laid back and easy going... but that also makes him forgetful and even slightly careless. Ha! I will try to remember those nice things I wrote when his loses his wallet and his keys this week and is driving me crazy. Hope your day 3 is going better. It's not easy!

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  7. Facebook seems to be the way to go because all the important people see it at once. But I agree with Julie that when with girlfriends, it's a great chance to brag on hubby instead of bash him. I'm loving this project, Lacie. These ideas are so simple, yet they mean so much!

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  8. Lacie,

    Last night was good - we talked gardening and writing and music - after so many years together, we have many of the same interests! Works out well for us both. then I gave him a back-rub because that's the kind of conversation that speaks volumes to him.

    This has been good for me, too. This is a really busy (both physically and emotionally) season for us and it's so easy to set aside the effort in our 24-yr marriage because we both "feel comfortable" with the knowledge that we're in it together forever. But I think it's so important - maybe ESPECIALLY - when we're busy, we still take the time to raise up the other spouse. It can hold back all kinds of junk - weariness, hopelessness, even just grumpiness sometimes!

    I'm always posting on my blog about men and champions and about how grateful I am for mine. I always talk about him on FB, too, but since he doesn't go on, it's not something he sees unless I drag him over to show him. But my blog, he makes a point to read every post, and my books, he makes a point to read them with me (See? I told you he was awesome!). So when I post something about him, he's totally ON for me. SO, that being said, I guess my Friday "Sister" post this week will be about my champion... It'll be fun to try to figure out how to tie him into the sister theme - ha!

    Blessings,
    Becky

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  9. Lacie, this is such a cool idea!!
    The thing is my husband LOATHES any kind of bragging about him. He truly hates it. But, no offense, he won't see your blog.
    Soooooooooo.

    John E. Major is one of 6 kids born to John A. and Stella Major. They are both profoundly deaf, yet raised all 6 kids to be hard working, kind people who knew that God was the head of Grandma and Grandpa's house.


    John E. went to the University of Toronto and paid his tuition, for 4 years, ENTIRELY with academic scholarships and awards. He did his undergrad in Forestry and excelled enough for one of his prof's to bring him to Vancouver with the company that lured him from U of T. John was paid by that company to do his Master's at UBC in Vancouver. The Federal Gov't came calling and we moved back to Ontario. Just s you know, they wanted John's boss/former prof but the prof suggested John instead and the Feds were quite happy to hire him. It is very, very hard to get a Federal Scientist job. He has published 40 papers in a filed where most people publish 3 or 4 in their entire career.

    He has coached kid's hockey here for 13 years and is known as one of the best coaches in town and has taken many of his teams to Provincials. And won. The parents LOVE him because he loves the kids and treats everyone with fairness, and he's respectful of the parents and makes the kids thank their parents for the sacrifices it takes to play the game. He is asked every year to coach the elite Provincial team, and only once has he said yes. The rest of the time, he's told them "My family needs a break to go on vacation". WHich is at ONtario Camp of the Deaf, with his elderly parents.

    He is stern and tough and no nonsense. He doesn't buy flowers but likes my huge perennial beds to look good. He NEVER talks about his work and alot of people think he waters plants at the Forestry Complex, but a few know his team won a seven digit prize for work on tree DNA.

    He can't stand it when I spend foolishly, but expects me to find the best power tools for my antique refinishing and never blinks when I say things like "I need a mouse sander." He will say "It looks great!! " When I refinish something and will brag me up to all kinds of people.

    He is insanely proud of me for writing a book. He is ridiculously proud of me for being a missionary in some of the most remote places on Earth. He tells his kids when they've done a good job.

    But the best part? Night and day, at least 5 times a day he'll say "I love you. You are beautiful. I wouldn't want anyone else. I love being with YOU."

    Like I said, he doesn't buy flowers, but I knwo where I stand in his eyes.

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  10. Thanks everyone for these wonderful comments. I'm loving this experiment and all of Kathi's easy tips for being intentional in our marriages. Who would have thought such simple things could matter so much!

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I'd love to hear your thoughts too!