Monday, October 8, 2012

The Husband Project - Day 1

Today kicks off our husband experiment week!! Everyone ready? :)

We're embarking on Kathi Lipp's 5 day challenge to "love our men on purpose and with a plan". 

Kathi Lipp
You can be as involved as you'd like this week by conducting the "homework" with your husband, or you may choose to simply watch as I try these assignments with my hubby and share my experiences with you each day. 

Either way, the end goal is the be intentional and selfless with how we choose to show our husbands love. 

So here we go. Today's homework is...

Project #1*

30 Minutes is All it Takes

Create Some Free Time When He Gets Home

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

Your Project:

Focus on your husbands transitional 30 minutes today. Would he like to be left alone to rest and rejuvenate, or does he want some undivided attention from you? The point is to let your husband know you value what he does out in the world, and that he has a safe loving place to come home and get refreshed at the end of the day.

Getting Creative
There are plenty of reasons why it might not be easy for you to give your husband some transition time at the end of the day. You need to look at what can work for your relationship. Be creative, like the stories listed below. Brainstorm with your friends until you find a situation that will work for you and your guy.

My friend, Joann, purposely scheduled her daughter’s dance classes twice a week at the same hour that her husband gets home from work. That way, her hubby comes home to an empty house. He gets some quiet, and she gets a more peaceful man.

One husband has his workshop out in the garage. His wife encourages him to go and hang out there for a while before dinner. (Since starting this arrangement, her husband has started helping out with the after-dinner clean up. Nice side benefit.)

Crockpots are The Husband Project’s best friend. Set your crockpot to be finished thirty minutes after your husband gets home from work. Let him know that you don’t need anything until dinner is ready. Don’t know a crockpot from a flower pot? Check out the recipes in The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at

Does your husband already have a great transition routine after getting home? Find some other little thing to bless that time. Maybe it’s making sure the TV is available, his favorite sweats are clean and ready to be changed into, or there’s a cold soda waiting for him in the fridge. It may be so small that he doesn’t even notice. That’s okay – you’ll know what you did.

What if your husband works from home? Maybe the best way to help him relax is to ask what he would like the schedule to be. Does he want dinner before or after he gets some time to recharge? Ask him what would make his night better.

Share with me: Do you already have a perfect routine for when your guy comes home in the evenings? Or does Kathi's suggestion give you something new to try? 

Good luck! :) 

**Assignment and excerpt used with permission from 


  1. How fun! I'm joining in this week, Lacie! My husband isn't working right now, so we might consider him like the work-from-home husband. I can find ways to give him so "free time", which for him means time away from the kids who demand his attention throughout the day. I can find ways to entertain them so he can recharge a little bit before dinner.

  2. Morning Ralene! So glad you're "playing" along with me. :) I'll be praying that you find the time and energy to give your husband some time of his own today.

  3. I'm joining this week. After 22+ years of marriage, I've learned to take a barometer reading when he first walks in the door. By his expression and demeanor, I can tell if he's had a great day or a not so great one. Then I know whether he wants some alone time or chatter. He always wants a hug and a kiss, so I'm good there. :D

    1. That's good that you can read his moods. :) My husband is really quiet when he gets home and I've found it takes him a good 20-30 minutes to go from business-Chris to home-Chris. And even though I know this...I'm still occasionally guilty of trying to chat him up the second he walks in. Oops. :)

  4. I've started getting up from whatever I'm doing and greeting him with a kiss and friendly hello. I let him know when dinner will be ready and let him go change, etc.

    I'll have to think about what "extra" to do. I think I do okay in this area now, but when we have kids and I'm a SAHM...yeah, I can imagine it'll be quite different!!

    1. I love hearing how all of you are so great at this! Good role models for me!!! :) Getting up to greet him with a kiss and hug is definitely something I should do more consistently.

  5. He normally gets attacked by the kids the second he steps in the door. Tonight I might have a cartoon on so he has a few minutes and have a cold beer and his favorite dinner ready. Might make it easier to unwind from a long day. Men and food... ;)

    1. Being attacked by the kids is probably a common setback for dads. A cartoon on sounds like a good idea. :)

  6. I was in Kathi's CE session at ACFW. It was excellent! Actually, my husband usually walks in and helps me get started with dinner. He's such a good guy. :)

  7. I am so excited about this husband project! I'm definitely going to try this---tomorrow. ;) Sadly, I need to run out the door as soon as hubby gets home today. That's unusual, so on regular days I'll be trying to be purposeful about transition time.

    1. Glad you'll be working through these assignments too! Husbands around the country...feel loved!! LOL

  8. Love this!! Honestly, I'm usually in a mild coma when he arrives home from work. Between getting dinner on, helping with homework, and just general afternoon tiredness, I'm lucky to wave "hi"! Terrible! I feel bad!

    I'm going to be more intentional tonight--thanks!!

  9. Jill, you sound like me! On top of everything else...a hug can't be that important...right?? :) But tonight he's getting one!! LOL

  10. Lacie,

    Honestly, this is one of the hardest things for me. I'm home all day with kids and when he gets home, I just want MY 30 minutes of uninterrupted me-time! He wants to talk and I can feel my eyes (and my brain!) glazing over... So tonight, I'm going to pay attention to him. He'll probably wonder what the heck is wrong with me - after 24 years, he knows I'm desperate for my alone time. Ha!

    I have about an hour and half today to prepare. Hm.

  11. Gwynly spends his day talking and interacting with 130 teens, so he comes home drained. I've spent my day alone for the most part and am eager to talk. I still have most of the 10,000 words a day we women are supposed to expend, but he's usually well over his more limited word count. I have to fight the urge to chatter away.

    On my more compassionate days, I'll have a beverage waiting for him when he gets home from school, give a brief account of my day when he asks, and allow him time to decompress. Later in the evening when he's more rested, we'll catch up in greater detail.


I'd love to hear your thoughts too!