Today is the first day of preschool for my little munchkin, Ava. We originally had her enrolled at a different preschool (the one her brother attended). I'm beginning to realize that not all of our decisions as parents get to be "cookie cutter". Bummer!
Chris and I agonized for a long time about where and when to enroll Cody in preschool and knew that since he was more timid socially, he would grow and benefit more in a large classroom setting. Turns out that's not the case for Ava. She doesn't struggle socially but we feel she'll benefit more from a leg up in the academic world.
We found a wonderful little preschool run by a lady that attends our church. She offers a more structured curriculum and after many questions and tours and requests for more information and hours spent praying and deliberating, my husband and I decided it would be the best fit for Ava. I'm disappointed that she won't be attending the same preschool as her brother did but I'm excited that she'll have her own independent experience, one tailored just for her.
I'm experiencing a mix of emotions right now; awe that she is almost four years old and ready to attend preschool, motherly pride that she is just as cute and perfect as she can be, selfish sadness that she will no longer be with me every minute of every day, excitement that she gets to experience new things - make new friends, learn new lessons, and a smidgen of guilt for being slightly relieved that I will have time to write during the day. (Did I just admit that out loud?)
It's hard to imagine that in one week, when Cody starts Jr. Kindergarten, I will only have one child with me at all times. Where did the time go? I have a very distinct awareness that the time Chris and I have with our kids is fleeting. Knowing that makes these milestones in their lives bittersweet. I want to savor every second I have with them...soak up as much of their "baby" years as I possibly can so in ten years I have no regrets when I look back.
In the future, when they're grown and gone, I'd like to be able to say that I was fully present, fully invested and fully appreciative of every moment we had together. Unfortunately, there just aren't enough moments to satisfy this mommy.
What emotions do you feel when you think about your kids growing up? If you're a stay at home parent, how do you plan to occupy your time when you have more of it for yourself?